How to Get a Girl to Say "Yes" - How to Seal the Deal When You Ask Women Out
The average guy asks himself how to get a girl to say "yes" to a date request - and the very question makes him tremble in his boots. The thought of rejection can make a guy fail to pop the question or even approach the girl he likes at all. And one too many rejections can be quite discouraging, to say the least.
There is hope, however. Improving your batting average in the dating game is as simple as doing things the right way, and that goes for everything right down to the way you ask a girl out. Here are some tips to improve your chances of getting a "yes".
How to Get a Girl to Say "Yes": Don’t Ask, Invite
In the presence of an attractive girl, guys can turn into wimps - maybe not obviously, but in subtle ways. All of a sudden, we’re on our toes, making sure everything we say is just right, trying our best to be "gentlemanly" and polite, and asking for a date in the faint hopes that she’ll agree.
The problem is, "asking" can lead directly to a "no!" In case you didn’t know it, women love confidence. One of the best times to display it is when you invite a woman out for a date - "invite" being the operative word here.
Instead of asking a question, such as "Would you like to go to meet up for a cup of coffee?", turn the request into a statement, such as "We should meet for a cup of coffee this Saturday" or "I’m going to check out this exhibit at the natural history museum on Friday; you should tag along." Tell her your intentions instead of submissively seeking her permission to spend time with her.
Asking a woman out in this way accomplishes two things. One, you’re subtly establishing yourself as a high-value leader who is demonstrating approval, instead of placing a girl on a pedestal and giving her all the power. You’re allowing her to become a part of your exciting lifestyle, to get a "sneak peek" into the life of an awesome guy who has a lot of cool stuff going on.
The second thing is that you’re projecting confidence by showing that your world won’t end if she misses out on dating you. You have enough interesting things to do that you’ll simply go by yourself or meet up with another (maybe more interesting) girl to go with if things don’t work out with this one.
Keep this in mind: when a girl senses that you have options, she realizes that you’re a desirable guy to be around - and that’s what makes her say "yes" when you ask her out.
Be as Specific as Possible
So, hopefully, you’ve had at least a short conversation with the woman before asking her out. You may have discovered at least one or two mutual interests, which is a great basis for deciding on a date location. Or, if you haven’t gone in-depth about mutual interests yet, you have enough interest in her to set up drinks or a cup of coffee.
In any case, when you ask a woman out, don’t just say "we should hang out sometime" and leave the content of the date vague and up for interpretation - specifically mention a place. You take the lead by knowing exactly where to go.
You should know the best coffee shops, bars, restaurants, and parks (great for simple walks on first dates) in town. If you’re not familiar with them, make sure you actually have a life and that you’re getting out enough to find them.
Spend some time each week to check out new spots and events. Whether you go with friends or you check out these places by yourself, you’re doing something that will prove to be invaluable for your dating life - you’re becoming a walking encyclopedia of interesting and fun things to do. You’ll never again be the boring guy who only ever takes girls to dinner and a movie (which is cool once you’re at the relationship stage, but is terrible for a first date).
Not only that, but women will appreciate the fact that you know how to take the lead and show them a good time. They hate it when guys are indecisive or can’t come up with a halfway-decent idea for a date. Demonstrate your knowledge of fun places and events, and you’re good to go.
Build Both Attraction and Comfort Before Asking Her Out
If you want to know how to get a girl to say "yes", know that you have to give her a reason to do so. And the most powerful reasons for her to go out with you are that she’s attracted to and comfortable with you.
Like most guys, you might think you can’t influence the amount of attraction women have towards you. Yes, a handsome face and a toned physique will catch their eyes - and yes, you should be stylishly dressed, clean, and sporting a nice haircut at all times - but physical appearance alone won’t seal the deal.
To get better results with women, you must learn the art of creating attraction. You can accomplish this by having an outward focus, bantering with women, and breaking the touch barrier. Tease the heck out of her if she says something silly. Don’t be afraid to disagree with her, or call her a "dork" or a "nerd" in a playful way.
When women are in the presence of a guy who knows how to flirt with confidence, they often find themselves powerfully attracted and ready to date him at the drop of a hat.
It’s also critical to build comfort. If she doesn’t feel safe opening herself up to you, there’s no chance you’ll get too far.
It’s easy to make girls comfortable around you. First, make sure you curtail any nervous habits such as shaking, stuttering, or shifting your eyes away from her too much. Second, make sure you’re making an emotional connection by "building rapport". If she tells a funny story from her childhood or mentions a frustration from work earlier in the day, show her you can relate by sharing your own story.
Don’t get too deep into the emotional side of things - it’s important to balance both the "flirtatious" and the "rapport-building" aspects of your conversation. It takes practice, but tapping into a girl’s playful, flirtatious side while building comfort and rapport is a winning strategy.
There you have it - three ways to increase your chances of getting girls to go out with you. If you want to get a girl to say "yes," invite instead of asking her out, know exactly where to take her, and amplify attraction and comfort during the first conversation.