Your Date Is 50+ And Never Married - What Gives?
You have met someone who is the same age as you, or at least an age that you prefer (50 or older) and you’ve just found out that the person has never been married? Are they normal? Is there something drastically wrong with them? How does someone make it to 50 without getting married at least once? Are all of these questions running through your mind? It’s normal. As a society, we are taught that you should get married in your twenties or thirties, as that’s when you’re primed to have children and it’s also when you should be starting your career and getting your life on track to settle down. Your date somehow managed to bypass that, but it definitely does not automatically make them a weirdo.
It Is OK To Ask
If someone made it this long without getting married, it’s likely that they haven’t made it that long without someone asking about it. They’re probably used to getting bombarded with questions. When you ask about their situation, be delicate about it. Ask them as if you’re fascinated with their lifestyle, as if you generally want to know. Don’t ask them with a look on your face like they’re diseased or something. The more tact you have, the more likely you are to receive a straight and honest answer.
Some People Haven’t Met The One
Too many people jump into marriage for the heck of it. They go out on a few dates and before they know they’re living with the other person. Soon, they get married because that’s just what you’re supposed to do in a relationship and kids come next. Soon, the couple finds that they have little in common and they end up divorcing, usually after the last kid graduates from high school, but some split long before that.
All these people who jumped into marriage are now living separate lives and some even have to pay spousal or child support because of their hasty decisions. Your date managed to avoid a nasty situation and has maybe held out for just the right person. There is nothing wrong with that.
On the other hand, the person might be a commitment-phobe, the person might have Peter Pan syndrome or they may be bat crap crazy. The best thing to do is to have an open mind and ask the person honestly about his or her situation.
Whatever answer your date gives you, have an open mind and realize that everything they tell you is in the past. Your date and you have a lot to look forward to. It should be about right now and the future you two share. Everything that has happened before you two met, including the fact that your date has never been married, has made you two who you are. Celebrate that fact and you’re much more likely to enjoy a long and healthy relationship together.
Who knows, you might be your date’s very first marriage - if you play your cards right. Good luck.